Subtitle: The Magkapatid Series
Hello World. I'm working on something right now and I wish to share it with you guys soon..
For the mean time, I'm leaving you with these pictures to satiate your hungry selves. Bwahahaha! :D
Extra rice sir?
Monday, May 30, 2011
Random Cute Guys Find 4
Hello World. I'm working on something right now and I wish to share it with you guys soon..
For the mean time, I'm leaving you with these pictures to satiate your hungry selves. Bwahahaha! :D
Thursday, May 26, 2011
Bucket List
Remember the movie Bucket List? Some background here.
This post is not very timely (please, masamang damo ako, matagal pa akong mamamatay) but I made this because I knew a friend's friend na may taning na at a young age. Well, it is sad news indeed. I cannot believe kasi he's young, on the early twenties.
I formulated this list since Sunday and I haven't added up anything yet. The list of the things that I'd want to accomplish before I leave this earth.
I might add up some things pag may naisip pa ako.
This post is not very timely (please, masamang damo ako, matagal pa akong mamamatay) but I made this because I knew a friend's friend na may taning na at a young age. Well, it is sad news indeed. I cannot believe kasi he's young, on the early twenties.
I formulated this list since Sunday and I haven't added up anything yet. The list of the things that I'd want to accomplish before I leave this earth.
- ice skate in Antarctica
- witness the Aurora Borealis/ Aurora Australis
- cross the Atlantic with a Carnival cruise ship
- sky dive
- to finish an autobiography
- climb Mt. Apo's peak
- shop at Beverly Hills
- dine in executive restaurants in Spain, France and Italy
- have a blonde fling
- to play a song with the accompaniment of the golden harp
- touch the surface of the Mona Lisa
- take a picture of me in front of an Arabic palace (which is impossible)
- to pilot an Air Force plane
- go to the tombs of Shakespeare, Aristotle, William Marrion Branham and Albert Einstein
- see at least one of the 7 wonders of the Ancient World
- take the trans-Siberian train
- meet Jennifer Garner
- play the piano with Yiruma
- have a son
- try the wonders of Accupuncture
- watch an Olympic or a World Cup game.
- cross a portion of the Bermuda Triangle
- drive a Pagani or Ferrari at racing speed
- eat the most expensive chocolate or drink the most expensive red wine.
- stay for three days in the Presidential suite of Dusit Thani Hotel in Pattaya, Thailand
- spend a day at the Harry Potter Theme Park
I might add up some things pag may naisip pa ako.
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
New Love??
Katext ko si John Edward for more or less three months na. Simula nung una pa lang kaming magkatext nakaramdam na ako na nagpaparamdam siya sa akin. Sabi niya, ang sarap ko daw katext, at ako lang daw ang nakakatext niya ng sobrang frequent for the past year. By the way, sa PR ko rin nakilala itong si John.
Kinilig si aketch. Wahaha.
About a month ago, lagi na siyang may "mwuah" sa mga texts. Natatawa ako sa sarili ko, because I dunno if its an indication of something. Para kaming pseudo-boyfriends.
Natutuwa na ako sa threads ng texts namin at gusto ko lang i-share. lolz
Oo, hahalikan kita pag nagkita tayo. Wahaha. :D Talandi. Dahil birthday mo bukas. :)
Nung isang araw naman, nagchat pa kami at c2c (oi, hindi to bastos ah. wholesome akez. NEVER pa akong nakipagjakol sa cam choz!) at wala lang, kinilig lang ako, di pa kami nagkikita at bukod sa pics ay first time ko siya makita na gumagalaw. Naks naman.
Paepal na PS lang. May nanliligaw sa akin, three months na rin. Nung last weeks nung last semester, lagi niya ako sinusundo sa school. Tawagin natin siya sa codename na Carboi.
Napaka-generous nitong si Carboi. Binibigyan niya ako ng chocolates, food, at kung anik anik na treat. Nung unang araw namin na magkita, nag-dinner kami sa Tiendesitas and right after that pumunta kami sa Banapple sa Katips tapos Bo's. Lahat libre niya pati drive home.
Anyway. Okay naman sa panlasa ko itong si Carboi. Maputi siya at may braces at professional type. Mas maliit nga lang saken ng kaunti. Pero ayoko sa kanya. Kasi may gusto na akong iba. At yun ay si John. Kahit walang something na binibigay sa akin si John ay mas mahal ko siya Ate Charing. Mayaman itong si Carboi ngunit tama nga sila, hindi mo kayang bilhin at i-impersonate ang tunay na pagmamahal..
Lately ay nagbakasyon sa SG itong si Carboi at bumili pa ng iPad 2. He already. Siya na! Gusto ko sanang hiritan, sana binilhan mo rin ako. Because I know, bibilhan niya talaga ako. Kaya ko sinasabi dahil dapat ay kasama ako sa trip na yun. Pero hindi ko tinanggap ang tickets right after na...
Nasabi ko na kay Carboi na kuya lang talaga ang tingin ko sa knya ngunit hindi niya ito tinatanggap at lalo pa siyang nagpaparamdam sa mga texts like, I complete him daw chorva. Pyutchang kinamis! Hindi ko keri ang magpaasa ng tao pero di ko na alam ang gagawin ko para maidispatcha na siya.
Basta ang alam ko ay special ang pagtingin ko kay John and I wish na may mapuntahan ang relationship namin...
Kinilig si aketch. Wahaha.
About a month ago, lagi na siyang may "mwuah" sa mga texts. Natatawa ako sa sarili ko, because I dunno if its an indication of something. Para kaming pseudo-boyfriends.
Natutuwa na ako sa threads ng texts namin at gusto ko lang i-share. lolz
Oo, hahalikan kita pag nagkita tayo. Wahaha. :D Talandi. Dahil birthday mo bukas. :)
Nung isang araw naman, nagchat pa kami at c2c (oi, hindi to bastos ah. wholesome akez. NEVER pa akong nakipagjakol sa cam choz!) at wala lang, kinilig lang ako, di pa kami nagkikita at bukod sa pics ay first time ko siya makita na gumagalaw. Naks naman.
Haha, unsolicited screenshot! :)
___________Paepal na PS lang. May nanliligaw sa akin, three months na rin. Nung last weeks nung last semester, lagi niya ako sinusundo sa school. Tawagin natin siya sa codename na Carboi.
Napaka-generous nitong si Carboi. Binibigyan niya ako ng chocolates, food, at kung anik anik na treat. Nung unang araw namin na magkita, nag-dinner kami sa Tiendesitas and right after that pumunta kami sa Banapple sa Katips tapos Bo's. Lahat libre niya pati drive home.
Anyway. Okay naman sa panlasa ko itong si Carboi. Maputi siya at may braces at professional type. Mas maliit nga lang saken ng kaunti. Pero ayoko sa kanya. Kasi may gusto na akong iba. At yun ay si John. Kahit walang something na binibigay sa akin si John ay mas mahal ko siya Ate Charing. Mayaman itong si Carboi ngunit tama nga sila, hindi mo kayang bilhin at i-impersonate ang tunay na pagmamahal..
Lately ay nagbakasyon sa SG itong si Carboi at bumili pa ng iPad 2. He already. Siya na! Gusto ko sanang hiritan, sana binilhan mo rin ako. Because I know, bibilhan niya talaga ako. Kaya ko sinasabi dahil dapat ay kasama ako sa trip na yun. Pero hindi ko tinanggap ang tickets right after na...
Nasabi ko na kay Carboi na kuya lang talaga ang tingin ko sa knya ngunit hindi niya ito tinatanggap at lalo pa siyang nagpaparamdam sa mga texts like, I complete him daw chorva. Pyutchang kinamis! Hindi ko keri ang magpaasa ng tao pero di ko na alam ang gagawin ko para maidispatcha na siya.
Basta ang alam ko ay special ang pagtingin ko kay John and I wish na may mapuntahan ang relationship namin...
Sunday, May 22, 2011
Not-So-Straight Stuff
I dunno if it's just that an Engineering course got me closer to lots and lots of boys. I've been used to the company of boys (nalumos na ko sa kadaghan), and I just need to move around like any of them. I play the ball game, we enjoy DotA and other LAN games, have some green stuff coming on breaktimes, sportstalk, and the talk on girlfriends and flirting.
Since most of my barkada have already graduated and are now on the Board Exams review, I doubt if coming back to school will be as happy as it was in each semester five years ago.
Nevertheless, in a schoolyear's first semester, NBA will never get out of the list. This conference, my Eastern favorite Boston Celtics was already cut from the Playoffs, so now I place my devotion to the Chicago Bulls. For the Western conference, I'm up for the Oklahoma City Thunder.
For the past year now, I haven't been in touch with the new patches of DotA and my Ragnarok accounts. I wonder how the addition of the third jobs will make the game more exciting (as for Ragnarok). If I level my High Priest up and decide a job change, it will become a Bishop.
Earlier this evening, I was ejaculating to the thought of the first time I did the deed with my last girlfriend from the university of our homeland scholars. I was so horny with the thought, I did it while standing, pumping with my hand on the ironing stand and acting as if I was f*cking my hand, while sitting, while on a push-ups position with my left arm for support, while laid down, while kneeling. GEESH, I'm a TOMBOY!
Friday, May 20, 2011
Of Storms in Friendships
I just don't buy the idea that YOU are planting these allegations over my alive-and-very-much-effin'-horny self. Apparently, YOU have no idea of what this boulder of circumstance is all about. You are my best friend for seven years now.
This storm in our friendship, I guess, will take a longer time to get settled. I want you to think about what you did, because I still don't want to replace my 'You are my best friend for seven years now' with 'You were my best friend for seven years'.
Oh! By the way for Heaven's sake, you never really got anything right. My PR account never had face pictures to boot. I only had pictures of my tummy and the infamous abdominal muscles with the crazy horny tattoo like that one on my Microbiograph's image. But you are accusing me of something outrageous and ridiculous. You never saw me there. You are my best friend for seven years now.
It was like a Dungbomb dropped at Dolores Umbridge's office that your sexuality has been compromised over Facebook by this out gay guy whom we've known for the same number of years. I guess I know the reason. I have been witness to how you adored my body and gave me an indecent proposal of topping you at your place via a message on my PR account. I was indeed looking for a good f*ck at that time but I was disgusted of what I discovered. The message you sent me contained two of your half-upper body shots with your face proudly smiling at the heck on the camera. I WAS SHOCKED, that I didn't open my account for 9 days just to avoid your second and third messages without me replying to the first and second.
It was a no-brainer, there was no mistaking, it was YOU. You are my best friend for seven years now.
I never did anything to compel you, to make you know that I already discovered your dirty little secret of sleeping with men: being a bottom for top guys when in bed. I understood your situation, but to drag me with you? Oh, its a very silly thing to do. I won't be with you this time, because I'm protecting my image and professionalism -- I don't want any blot or wrinkle on my name. And please, if you claim boldly on seeing me on that freaking gay social networking website, I would shake it off like a fly eying dinner. YOU never saw me there. YOU never had proof. We never even had a conversation. Not a f*cking message from me. I wanted to give you the comforts of our friendship by having a shoulder to lean on these tough times because You are my best friend for seven years now.
This storm in our friendship, I guess, will take a longer time to get settled. I want you to think about what you did, because I still don't want to replace my 'You are my best friend for seven years now' with 'You were my best friend for seven years'.
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
The Original Vampire: Niklaus
Okay, okay. Mahirap ang internet sa bahay kaya sasamantalahin ko na itong pag-upload ng latest stills ko. At lahat ata sila ay si Klaus ng The Vamprie Diaries Season 2! wahaha.
Look at the body... very very yummy! At siyempre, ang face value. Pogi nitong pare kong original vampire sa kwento.
(And this is the niche for me to weed out the other TVD addicts, just like me, lol, if any)
EYE FEAST ang sumusunod na pictures:
Haha. Enjoy!
Look at the body... very very yummy! At siyempre, ang face value. Pogi nitong pare kong original vampire sa kwento.
(And this is the niche for me to weed out the other TVD addicts, just like me, lol, if any)
EYE FEAST ang sumusunod na pictures:
Kagigising lang ni kuya mula sa pagtulog... ng hubo't hubad!
Haha. Enjoy!
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
The Twigs of Fear
To admit, the survival of a decade-long terrorism plan laid out by the group Al-Qaeda formerly led by now deceased Osama bin Laden is one of the biggest opposition twigs that brought out fear all over the world.
According to Maria Ressa, CNN Jakarta Bureau Chief and former ABS-CBN News and Current Affairs Head, after the worldwide siege for the members of the Al-Qaeda and this organization’s squirmy tentacles such as the Jemaah Islamiyah, all possible forms of communication between these networks have been narrowly traced. Ergo, to avoid further eavesdropping, the system has been reduced to a human courier form of messaging. A detailed analysis of this methodology has been printed in her book, Seeds of Terror.
Such a downfall of communication equals an infection of major attacks.
This is the reason why, as compared to more than ten years ago, there have been no solid terror installations across the globe from AQ. The futile attempts to distraction have been carried out by their internetwork members such as the Southeast Asian leg Jemaah Islamiyah, but none of these have been fruitful enough to spread mass panic in the second decade of the 21st century.
It is still in question though, if Abu Sayyaff is inside AQ’s protected circle but the caution implored by our government to this group is nevertheless extravagant. However, to ensure that the United States has a hand on all of these terrorist groups, it has never failed to send out a “secret mission team” which of course is publicized by the partnership of the US Army and the Armed Forces of the Philippines as the Balikatan Exercises.
Terrorism countermeasure is a serious matter which involves careful and sufficient eradication from the government. Aside from the fact that a weak protection from the Army and the Police will spring more of these twigs of fear, the citizens can also play a big part in eliminating the masked figures of trepidation. Constant vigilance is the only contribution that we have against these social horrors.
As this is all about the twigs of fear, we now boil down to the vital part: its identification. All groups threatening the peace of our living are suspected to grow from the seeds of terror.
On Maria Ressa’s book though, there is a serious blow on the effects of religion to the ability to justifiably carry out crooked ideals.
This is more than just the terrorism itself, but on the adverse complexities between the Catholic and the Muslim faith. In as much as I would like to remove this from the topic, its recurrence is inevitable like the rising of the sun. I disclaim the presence of judgment. I do not judge because the people on those faiths that I know are different from those who lead the terrorism and the counterterrorism.
In the end of all these speculations, there is one thing that we wish to attain: Peace. In the future years there might be renewal of setbacks but one thing is still evident, and it is that the flame of the human spirit is still more powerful than the bashes of high caliber machines. Terrorism is a waning cycle, and acts against it are moving closer to the greater finality of this soft war.
If permitted, this post is to be continued.
According to Maria Ressa, CNN Jakarta Bureau Chief and former ABS-CBN News and Current Affairs Head, after the worldwide siege for the members of the Al-Qaeda and this organization’s squirmy tentacles such as the Jemaah Islamiyah, all possible forms of communication between these networks have been narrowly traced. Ergo, to avoid further eavesdropping, the system has been reduced to a human courier form of messaging. A detailed analysis of this methodology has been printed in her book, Seeds of Terror.
Such a downfall of communication equals an infection of major attacks.
This is the reason why, as compared to more than ten years ago, there have been no solid terror installations across the globe from AQ. The futile attempts to distraction have been carried out by their internetwork members such as the Southeast Asian leg Jemaah Islamiyah, but none of these have been fruitful enough to spread mass panic in the second decade of the 21st century.
It is still in question though, if Abu Sayyaff is inside AQ’s protected circle but the caution implored by our government to this group is nevertheless extravagant. However, to ensure that the United States has a hand on all of these terrorist groups, it has never failed to send out a “secret mission team” which of course is publicized by the partnership of the US Army and the Armed Forces of the Philippines as the Balikatan Exercises.
Terrorism countermeasure is a serious matter which involves careful and sufficient eradication from the government. Aside from the fact that a weak protection from the Army and the Police will spring more of these twigs of fear, the citizens can also play a big part in eliminating the masked figures of trepidation. Constant vigilance is the only contribution that we have against these social horrors.
As this is all about the twigs of fear, we now boil down to the vital part: its identification. All groups threatening the peace of our living are suspected to grow from the seeds of terror.
On Maria Ressa’s book though, there is a serious blow on the effects of religion to the ability to justifiably carry out crooked ideals.
This is more than just the terrorism itself, but on the adverse complexities between the Catholic and the Muslim faith. In as much as I would like to remove this from the topic, its recurrence is inevitable like the rising of the sun. I disclaim the presence of judgment. I do not judge because the people on those faiths that I know are different from those who lead the terrorism and the counterterrorism.
In the end of all these speculations, there is one thing that we wish to attain: Peace. In the future years there might be renewal of setbacks but one thing is still evident, and it is that the flame of the human spirit is still more powerful than the bashes of high caliber machines. Terrorism is a waning cycle, and acts against it are moving closer to the greater finality of this soft war.
If permitted, this post is to be continued.
Sunday, May 15, 2011
Random Cute Guys Find 3
Wala akong magawa. I exported all of my Blogger's xml file just to have a copy of those, it's not that bad to be sure anyway.
And, it was a while since I last posted a random cute guy on the site. After the negative comments on Guy Find 2, I'll try to have more guys on the site. Kaya ang title, Random Cute Guys because I have not 1, 2 but three! haha. Standards ko lang pala ang cuteness so bahala nah! gow sagow!
And, it was a while since I last posted a random cute guy on the site. After the negative comments on Guy Find 2, I'll try to have more guys on the site. Kaya ang title, Random Cute Guys because I have not 1, 2 but three! haha. Standards ko lang pala ang cuteness so bahala nah! gow sagow!
Guy 1.
Guy 2. Kamag-anak Nitong Guy na 'to.
Guy 3. Ooops, may regalo si Guy 3 sa iyo, dear reader. Do not scroll down until ur ready...
(EDIT: salamat egG., excited lang ako. instead na i-scroll down mo, eto, pindutin mo!)
Cute Guy 3's Surprise
(EDIT: salamat egG., excited lang ako. instead na i-scroll down mo, eto, pindutin mo!)
Cute Guy 3's Surprise
May bet ka ba sa kanila? Dali! Pakilala kita. Ching! Bwahaha. Random nga eh.
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Iskolar
I was blissed by the discovery that I have once again reached the average grade required for a College Scholarship.
Yeah, Dean's List! Thank You Lord! :)
Sunday, May 8, 2011
Isang Mahabang Paglakbay Part 2
Ang tagaaal!
hindi ko sinasadya pero nung pagpaling ng mukha ko ay nahalikan ko siya! hahahaha, ang lambot ng labi niya, amoy strawberry ang hininga niya at nakakahumaling siyang laplapin! nilayo niya agad ang mukha niya at sabay sabing,
-- sabi ni *insert bloggero here* saken. nakuha ko ang number niya dahil nag-message pa talaga siya sa profile ko para lang matanong na daw ako kung ano ang nangyari samin ni Dan. Sabi ko sa kanya, e hindi ka nga nagco-comment eh! Sabi niya naman (sa text na lahat to) na baka daw kasi mabahiran ang busilak at kapita-pitagan niyang namesung! haha hindot! peaceout.
So much for the peptalk, here is the story. Kung hindi mo alam kung san galing ito, may link teh, paki-click na lang.
______________________________________________________________
"ano ulit?"sabi niya.
hindi ko sinagot ang tanong niya pero tumayo ako sa kinauupuan ko at umakyat sa 3rd floor na napakaluwag at walang tao. hindi ko alam nung puntong iyon kung susunod ba siya o hindi ngunit mas malakas ang pakiramdam ko na susunod siya.
"bawal dito ah, bat ka umakyat?" wika niya.
"jakol tayo." sabi ko. hindi ko alam kung pano ko nasambit yun ng ganon kaagad-agad.
ngiting aso si koya. futa, nakakalibog. habang ngumingiti siya ay inaayos niya ang twalya na nakasabit sa leeg niya: mapanukso, nakakaakit. hinubad niya yung sando niya.
"oi, bat ka naghuhubad?" kinakabahan kong sinabi. "baka may umakyat."
"ganito talaga ako pag nagsasalsal eh, tara na, upo tayo dun" sabay turo sa isang bahagi na may naka-stack na monoblock chairs.
ayos to ah. wika ko sa sarili ko. mukhang higit pa ito sa inaasahan ko.
pagkaupo ay hinawakan ko agad ang bahagi ng shorts niya na bahagyang bumubukol na. hinimas ko iyon at wala naman siyang tutol sa ginawa ko.
"gagawin ko rin ba sayo toh?"tanong niya. takte, painosente.
"oo naman, alangan namang ikaw lang ang masaya!"sabi ko.
hinimas niya rin si junjun. ang lapad ng palad niya. tska dama ko na magaling siya humawak ng alaga pag nagtitikol, kasi ang galing niya humimas. habang ginagawa niya naman yun, inakbayan ko siya sa likod gamit ang kaliwang kamay ko (nasa left side ko siya) sabay hinalikan ang shoulder niya.
bahagya siyang umungol. "parang may kuryente yung lips mo!" sabi niya.
natural, lalaki kaya tayo pareho. sa isip isip ko tska isang linggo na akong hindi nag-aahit nun baka yung balbas ko ang nadama nia.
pinasok ko ang kamay ko sa loob ng shorts niya at nahawakan ko agad ang ulo, lumagpas na kasi sa garter ng brief niya sa sobrang tigas. gifted itong si kuya, sabi ko na nga ba. hinubad niya ang shorts niya pati na rin ang briefs habang nilalaro ko yung ulo.
hindi ko na talaga mapigil ang sarili ko, gusto ko siya i-kiss! pero kasi baka hindi pumayag at madisappoint lng ako. baka mawala yung gana namin pareho in case na di pwede kaya di ko na lang tinanong kung pwede. pero nagulat ako ng biglang...
kinagat niya ang tenga ko! err masakit, gigil ang mokong. pero pinabayaan ko lang. sinasalsal ko siya ng left hand tapos yung right hand ko ginamit ko para maghubad na rin. pagkahubad ko ay mabilis din niyang tinaas-baba ang kamay niya sa tigas na tigas ko na ring sandata..
"okay lang ba na maghalikan tayo?"
POTANG INA! Inosenteng inosente talaga! Parang nahiya naman ako bigla sa sarili ko. O baka libog na libog lang siya? Pero wala ng oras para dun. Hindi ko sinagot ang tanong niya, anyway, actions speak louder than words. nag-eskrima ang mga dila namin sa laway na puno ng libog at tukso.. nilasahan ko ang lahat ng bahagi ng bibig niya.. masaraff siya! matamis, malambot at nakakaadik.. parang candy at marshmallow na pinagsama..
halos ayaw ko na iwan ang kanyang lips..pero dahil na-tempt ako sa junior niya! haha. tinry ko talagang isubo. from jakol naging oral sex. pero, since I'm a disgrace to our world dahil di talaga ako mahilig sumubo, back to bate nalang.. lubricated na siya at lalo kong binilisan ang pagsalsal sa etits niya..
"ooohhh,ukininam ang sarap..." ang tanging nasabi niya.
ilocano pala. pero oblivious na ako nun. since i can't keep my mouth from being busy, hinalikan ko siya sa tenga, sa likod ng tenga, sa leeg, sa right nipple habang sinasalsal at walang patid ang halinghing ni kups. sinabihan ko siya na wag siyang masyadong maingay dahil nag-eecho na talaga yung ungol niya.. hihi
nang pareho na kaming malapit nagrequest siya na pwedeng magsabay daw ba kaming labasan. sabi ko walang problema.. patuloy siya sa pagsalsal sa akin at ganun din nmn ako sa kanya. alam ko na malapit na malapit na siya nung pumitlag ang alaga niya at mas tumigas. nung naramdaman ko yun torpedo na siya kay junjun. medyo dry kaya dinuraan niya. ayun.. mga less than a minute ay,
"ooohhh, tanigna, malapit na talaga ako" sabi ko
at nilabasan na siya. hmpf siya ang nagrequest pero siya ang nauna.. pero naka-dalawang jumpshot ang katas niya sa ere at nilabasan na rin ako.. ang lagkit nung sa kanya ate charo. ginamit ko yun para i-lubricate siya at tila walang katapusan ang putok niya. siguro 7times yun hanggang sa maubusan ng hininga ang etits niya na tila ba hinihingal kung labasan. ako naman naka-tatlo lang ata.
hingal din si Dan. ang sarap niya tignan na lupaypay at di niya napigilang humiga sa sahig habang nakaunan ang dalawang palad niya sa ulo niya. for people who got armpit fetish purrfect ang eksena na yun para sa inyo :p
napagod din ako at naisip kong humiga sa nicely chiseled chest niya pero baka di na pumayag. nagsuot na kami ulit ng shorts after a couple of minutes tapos usap-usap muna. at that point tinamaan na talaga ako ng antok pero siya ata eh mas nabuhay ang dugo. mas naging madaldal.
"sarap ng ginawa natin tsong, pwede pala yun," sabi niya.
and it all dawned on me -- the guilt after the lustful encounter. parang sa lagay eh ako ang nagmulat sa kanya sa ganun.
"ngayon mo lang ba naexperience na may kasabay magjakol??"
"oo, ayos nga eh, sarap pala pag may kasama."bulalas ni gwapito.
sabi ko sa sarili ko talagang ayos. kung isang normal na guy yun sa Maynila baka di ko mapapayag ng ganun
"tulog na ako, kapagod eh. good night"
"ay, sige." nabakas ko ang lungkot sa mukha niya. siguro dahil nawala na ang antok niya at wala na siyang makakausap. kamot ulo siya habang palayo ako. i took one backward glance at nginitian ko siya. ngumiti din siya.
hindi ko malilimutan yun. isa yun sa mga rare moments na maiisipan ko na magtrip and it paid off really well. gusto ko sana maulit pero, hindi ako lalakbay ng ganon kalayo para lang sa kanya! choz!
Friday, May 6, 2011
Long Time, Mom
I can't write anything to my Mama but I think I will be able to write anything about and for her.
PreScript: This is long. But this is for my mom. I don't wan't to set a limit for her.
I remember when I was four to five years young, my Mama and Papa used to work abroad, though not together. Mama went to Japan and Papa went to the Diego Garcia, one of the British Territories in the Atlantic. My mom was a singer. She works in a lounge and sings Japanese songs with a band. My dad is in a band too; he gives beat to the drums.
Even if you say I'm too young to possibly remember it, but I know I was crying hard when my mom left. Probably harder as compared to when my dad left. I guess it is because I'm used with dad leaving (even up to now).
I was six when mom came back. I think my parents had an agreement at that time to have only one of them working. From then on, it is my mom who tends to us. Papa comes home every six months or worst, in every two years.
This is the reason why I'm more of my mother's son than my dad's. I tell almost everything to my mom. I wanted her to know that I am trusting her and that I'm going to grow up as the son she had always wanted.
Being eldest in the family, its hard to set aside your responsibilities over your desires because your parents always looks at your faults and gives you a hard time if you can't live up to their expectations, if you can't follow whatever they have to tell you. Everyday is a training to being a Team Leader. Everyday, you get punishments like a Commander from the General whenever you break orders. You are always expected to be better than a babysitter when it comes to working with your siblings.
This is not a rant. But its more of giving my mom all credits because she made me into a good Team Leader, Commander and Babysitter, perhaps we could also include Housekeeper, Chef, and Butler. *LOL*
There were a lot of times when my mom and I had misunderstandings. The worst of them was when I was in high school. I did something to my neighbor which pissed my mom off. What she did was to talk it over between me, the concerned neighbor, and my neighbor's mom. I was so much of a rebel at that time, that I didn't care less of what I had to say. She slapped me in front of my neighbor's family because of that. Feeling humiliated, I ran away cursing her on my mind. Later, I knew that I was so wrong. When we got home, she cried and hugged me and said sorry in innumerable times, told me to never do it again and if it hurts me, it hurts her tenfold.
We never learn our lessons once, and in the later years there have been more instances of me and my mom fighting, either because I don't get what I want which I'm sure I deserved, or because she doesn't get what she wants which she thinks is good for her. I bet in their point of view, its the other way around.
As I figure it out, my being busy and her being workaholic brought about, somehow, an enstangement of feelings. When we eat dinner, we seldom talk and I always tend to get water or something when she starts asking things. There were times when I get home late just not to intersect with her late uwian time, to avoid either her afterwork rant or paglalambing. I go to school early so we won't have excuse to talk during the morning. I don't text her except if there is something important that I need to tell her. Whenever we stroll, I always make sure my iPod is with me so I can always get away from a conversation. I answer back everytime I 'think' I have the more right explanation.
But, I also realized, that I was much of an insensitive son which grows deeper to an insensitive man. Naaawa ako pag nakikita ko siya from work. She works 8 days a week which is if you sum up all the unpaid overtime and after work transactions. She doesn't even have time for herself. She comes home late and wakes up early for the next day. She can't treat herself unless all of our needs are fulfilled. As I think of it, all that she wanted was just make our lives easier yet, ganito ang ginagawa ko sa kanya.
Sometimes, when I'm on emo-mode, I think about the things that I should have told her. Of the secrets that had branched into more complex twigs of lies and false pretense. Of the times when I could have helped but I worsened the situation. Of the times when I refused to follow even if I knew she was right. Of the should-haves which could have been one step closer to a renewal: I hate myself that I screw as a son.
However, I still believe that it resolves to the proverb All Is Well That Ends Well. I regret the times that I did not tell her my true feelings. I disgust the lies that I had to tell even if some of them would make her feel better. I hate the moments when I had to follow my wrong self. I just wanted her to know that she is the only woman that is worth my life and that my life would suck without her. I wanted to give her an assurance that I'm always here to back her up and defend her if I need to.
There are a few ocassions wherein I could have told her this but there is a brevity in the courage of my tounge to release the words. Words which might have been the only thing that she needs to hear to weaken our differences, if not erase them:
I love you so much Ma.
*This post came from my old blog and was published 8th of May, 2010. Happy Mother's Day to all the mothers in this Earth.
PreScript: This is long. But this is for my mom. I don't wan't to set a limit for her.
I remember when I was four to five years young, my Mama and Papa used to work abroad, though not together. Mama went to Japan and Papa went to the Diego Garcia, one of the British Territories in the Atlantic. My mom was a singer. She works in a lounge and sings Japanese songs with a band. My dad is in a band too; he gives beat to the drums.
Even if you say I'm too young to possibly remember it, but I know I was crying hard when my mom left. Probably harder as compared to when my dad left. I guess it is because I'm used with dad leaving (even up to now).
I was six when mom came back. I think my parents had an agreement at that time to have only one of them working. From then on, it is my mom who tends to us. Papa comes home every six months or worst, in every two years.
This is the reason why I'm more of my mother's son than my dad's. I tell almost everything to my mom. I wanted her to know that I am trusting her and that I'm going to grow up as the son she had always wanted.
Being eldest in the family, its hard to set aside your responsibilities over your desires because your parents always looks at your faults and gives you a hard time if you can't live up to their expectations, if you can't follow whatever they have to tell you. Everyday is a training to being a Team Leader. Everyday, you get punishments like a Commander from the General whenever you break orders. You are always expected to be better than a babysitter when it comes to working with your siblings.
This is not a rant. But its more of giving my mom all credits because she made me into a good Team Leader, Commander and Babysitter, perhaps we could also include Housekeeper, Chef, and Butler. *LOL*
There were a lot of times when my mom and I had misunderstandings. The worst of them was when I was in high school. I did something to my neighbor which pissed my mom off. What she did was to talk it over between me, the concerned neighbor, and my neighbor's mom. I was so much of a rebel at that time, that I didn't care less of what I had to say. She slapped me in front of my neighbor's family because of that. Feeling humiliated, I ran away cursing her on my mind. Later, I knew that I was so wrong. When we got home, she cried and hugged me and said sorry in innumerable times, told me to never do it again and if it hurts me, it hurts her tenfold.
We never learn our lessons once, and in the later years there have been more instances of me and my mom fighting, either because I don't get what I want which I'm sure I deserved, or because she doesn't get what she wants which she thinks is good for her. I bet in their point of view, its the other way around.
As I figure it out, my being busy and her being workaholic brought about, somehow, an enstangement of feelings. When we eat dinner, we seldom talk and I always tend to get water or something when she starts asking things. There were times when I get home late just not to intersect with her late uwian time, to avoid either her afterwork rant or paglalambing. I go to school early so we won't have excuse to talk during the morning. I don't text her except if there is something important that I need to tell her. Whenever we stroll, I always make sure my iPod is with me so I can always get away from a conversation. I answer back everytime I 'think' I have the more right explanation.
But, I also realized, that I was much of an insensitive son which grows deeper to an insensitive man. Naaawa ako pag nakikita ko siya from work. She works 8 days a week which is if you sum up all the unpaid overtime and after work transactions. She doesn't even have time for herself. She comes home late and wakes up early for the next day. She can't treat herself unless all of our needs are fulfilled. As I think of it, all that she wanted was just make our lives easier yet, ganito ang ginagawa ko sa kanya.
Sometimes, when I'm on emo-mode, I think about the things that I should have told her. Of the secrets that had branched into more complex twigs of lies and false pretense. Of the times when I could have helped but I worsened the situation. Of the times when I refused to follow even if I knew she was right. Of the should-haves which could have been one step closer to a renewal: I hate myself that I screw as a son.
However, I still believe that it resolves to the proverb All Is Well That Ends Well. I regret the times that I did not tell her my true feelings. I disgust the lies that I had to tell even if some of them would make her feel better. I hate the moments when I had to follow my wrong self. I just wanted her to know that she is the only woman that is worth my life and that my life would suck without her. I wanted to give her an assurance that I'm always here to back her up and defend her if I need to.
There are a few ocassions wherein I could have told her this but there is a brevity in the courage of my tounge to release the words. Words which might have been the only thing that she needs to hear to weaken our differences, if not erase them:
I love you so much Ma.
*This post came from my old blog and was published 8th of May, 2010. Happy Mother's Day to all the mothers in this Earth.
Thursday, May 5, 2011
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
Isang Mahabang Paglakbay Part 1
Noong Linggo ay nagpunta kami sa Jala-jala, Lalawigan ng Rizal. Hindi ko sukat akalain na ang isang paglalakbay sa malayong probinsya na ito ay titighaw sa aking uhaw na tumagal na rin ng halos isang buwan.
Retreat/resort ang pinuntahan namin. Maaga pa noong nakarating kami kaya medyo nag-ikot ikot muna ako sa lugar, naghanap-hanap ng pwede. Haha. Joke lang. Hindi ko naman talaga inaasahan na may mahanap ako sapagkat pagrerelax nga naman ang ipinunta namin doon.
30 minutes ng pagtambay, pwede na daw pumunta sa rooms. Habang papunta sa mga rooms doon, nakita ko siya at agad akong nagkaroon ng interes sa kanya habang binubuhat niya ang mga silya papunta dun sa gathering area. Medyo may kaputian at para bang alangan sa kanya ang maging isang probinsyano. Sabi ko sa sarili ko "yes sarap naman dito. Lagot ka sakin mamayang gabi hihi"..
Habang naglalakad-lakad, lagi ko siyang nakakasalubong at lagi ko rin siyang tinititigan. Nagulat ako sa ikalawang beses na nagkasalubong kami ay nakatingin din siya at ngumiti (dahil topless na ako nun at maliligo na sa pool). May naramdaman akong kakaiba at nagsimula ng bumukol ang nasa shorts ko. Sabi ko sa sarili ko "wag ngayon takte ka kitang kita ka jan" lolz.
Habang swim swim si ateng di maalis sa isip ko ang lalaking yun dahil kung hindi niyo pa alam, ang greatest fetish ko ay WORKERS! tama, tama.... Muntik na akong makainom ng tubig dahil wala ako sa katinuan while swimming.
Fast forward. Kinagabihan, after kumain, edi yung iba naglalaro ng basketball, picture taking, may naliligo parin, eh humiwalay ako. Pinilit kong hanapin ang guy na ito. May iba rin namang trabahador sa lugar pero mas gusto ko itong si guy. Ngunit medyo matagal na mag-11 na ata at muntik na akong mag-settle sa isang dark and somehow cute worker nang makita ko siya! Yeah, kaliligo lang ni koya. Hmm sarap may twalya pa sa balikat. naandon ako sa hagdan papuntang third floor (yung events hall na walang tao) at walang hiya-hiya ko siyang tinawag.
"kuya lika dito"
napakunot noo siya pero pumunta din naman siya sa kinalalagyan ko.
"kanina pa kita napapansin" ani niya.
"kanina pa rin kasi ako nagpapapansin" wika ko, medyo kinabahan ako kahit na garapalan na. "gano ka taga ka na nagttrabaho dito?"
"tumutulong lang ako dito pag summer pero di talaga ako dito nagttrabaho. pamangkin ako nung may-ari nitong resort."
tumaas bigla ang tingin ko sa kanya at bigla akong kinabahan lalo dahil alam ko na mahihirapan ako na i-fish siya.
"ah ganun ba.may gagawin ka pa ba? usap muna tayo."
"wala na pahinga na daw sabi nung caretaker. ikaw ba hindi ka pa matutulog?o may hinihintay ka? girlfriend ba yan?" at medyo naiilang ako sa tanong niya dahil siya ang dahilan why I'm staying up late.
"eh wala naman akong girlfriend," sabi ko. "ako pala si Mark. ikaw?" (imbento ko lang yung name)
"ah ako si Dan." sabi niya. "o sige maiwan na kita at medyo inaantok na ako eh."
Kinapalan ko na talaga lalo ang mukha ko. "gusto mo bang magpaantok?"
Napangiti siya and he gave me an incredulous look. Naguluhan siya sa kaniyang narinig.
(to be continued...)
Retreat/resort ang pinuntahan namin. Maaga pa noong nakarating kami kaya medyo nag-ikot ikot muna ako sa lugar, naghanap-hanap ng pwede. Haha. Joke lang. Hindi ko naman talaga inaasahan na may mahanap ako sapagkat pagrerelax nga naman ang ipinunta namin doon.
30 minutes ng pagtambay, pwede na daw pumunta sa rooms. Habang papunta sa mga rooms doon, nakita ko siya at agad akong nagkaroon ng interes sa kanya habang binubuhat niya ang mga silya papunta dun sa gathering area. Medyo may kaputian at para bang alangan sa kanya ang maging isang probinsyano. Sabi ko sa sarili ko "yes sarap naman dito. Lagot ka sakin mamayang gabi hihi"..
Habang naglalakad-lakad, lagi ko siyang nakakasalubong at lagi ko rin siyang tinititigan. Nagulat ako sa ikalawang beses na nagkasalubong kami ay nakatingin din siya at ngumiti (dahil topless na ako nun at maliligo na sa pool). May naramdaman akong kakaiba at nagsimula ng bumukol ang nasa shorts ko. Sabi ko sa sarili ko "wag ngayon takte ka kitang kita ka jan" lolz.
Habang swim swim si ateng di maalis sa isip ko ang lalaking yun dahil kung hindi niyo pa alam, ang greatest fetish ko ay WORKERS! tama, tama.... Muntik na akong makainom ng tubig dahil wala ako sa katinuan while swimming.
Fast forward. Kinagabihan, after kumain, edi yung iba naglalaro ng basketball, picture taking, may naliligo parin, eh humiwalay ako. Pinilit kong hanapin ang guy na ito. May iba rin namang trabahador sa lugar pero mas gusto ko itong si guy. Ngunit medyo matagal na mag-11 na ata at muntik na akong mag-settle sa isang dark and somehow cute worker nang makita ko siya! Yeah, kaliligo lang ni koya. Hmm sarap may twalya pa sa balikat. naandon ako sa hagdan papuntang third floor (yung events hall na walang tao) at walang hiya-hiya ko siyang tinawag.
"kuya lika dito"
napakunot noo siya pero pumunta din naman siya sa kinalalagyan ko.
"kanina pa kita napapansin" ani niya.
"kanina pa rin kasi ako nagpapapansin" wika ko, medyo kinabahan ako kahit na garapalan na. "gano ka taga ka na nagttrabaho dito?"
"tumutulong lang ako dito pag summer pero di talaga ako dito nagttrabaho. pamangkin ako nung may-ari nitong resort."
tumaas bigla ang tingin ko sa kanya at bigla akong kinabahan lalo dahil alam ko na mahihirapan ako na i-fish siya.
"ah ganun ba.may gagawin ka pa ba? usap muna tayo."
"wala na pahinga na daw sabi nung caretaker. ikaw ba hindi ka pa matutulog?o may hinihintay ka? girlfriend ba yan?" at medyo naiilang ako sa tanong niya dahil siya ang dahilan why I'm staying up late.
"eh wala naman akong girlfriend," sabi ko. "ako pala si Mark. ikaw?" (imbento ko lang yung name)
"ah ako si Dan." sabi niya. "o sige maiwan na kita at medyo inaantok na ako eh."
Kinapalan ko na talaga lalo ang mukha ko. "gusto mo bang magpaantok?"
Napangiti siya and he gave me an incredulous look. Naguluhan siya sa kaniyang narinig.
(to be continued...)
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